Monthly Online Death Café with Reverend Christina Sillari (2nd Wednesdays of month)
A Death Cafe is a group directed discussion of death with no agenda, objectives or themes. It is a discussion group rather than a grief support or counseling session. At its core, Death Cafe is a group-directed discussion where participants are encouraged to talk openly about death. There are no experts dictating conversation. Instead, it is a safe and supportive environment where we can explore how our own beliefs, cultures and experiences shape our relationship with death. The goal is simple: to increase awareness of death in a way that helps us make the most of our finite lives. Evenings 6– 7:30 PM (2nd Wednesday of the month) 1/14, 2/11, 3/11, 4/8, 5/13 (can attend one or all). Open to all. No registration required. On Zoom.
CVUUS’ hosted events in 2024 revolving around the issue of death and the things one might get in order before one dies. Three events were offered to the wider community of Addison County. See below.
Final Gifts: What to Do Before We Die (Jan 10, 2024) The panel included knowledgeable people covering issues such as simplifying the stuff in your life, getting important paperwork in place, information about Hospice & green burials, and Death with Dignity. Included was a time for questions & answers after each presentation. Resource sheets (below) and a display were offered. See Do’s and Don’ts Before You Die Resources 1.10.24
Community Remembrance Ceremony (Jan 12, 2024) Rev. Christina and leaders of CVUUS gathered us for a contemplative service of honoring and remembering loved ones we have lost, including Rev Martin Luther King Jr. Through photos, naming, music, candle lighting, and silence we honored family, friends and loved ones who have died.
Worship Service: Practicing Death (Jan 14, 2014) We know that there’s one thing we can count on in this life: that it will end! How can we prepare for this, and know that we’re not alone in the journey? Through looking at religious and cultural perceptions of death and our personal relationship with death we will explore what it means to practice dying so we can truly live. Led by Rev. Christina with Abi Sessions. See a recording here.
Medical Aid in Dying (Death Café) (Feb 20, 2024) A conversation hosted by Porter Medical Center’s Palliative Care Department led by Dr. Diana Barnard. Watch the extremely valuable and informing session here.
Words from Rev. Christina (Jan 2024)
When I was serving First Parish in Portland, the Stewardship Team was struggling to make the campaign different and interesting. We decided on a sermon series for stewardship month that included services on death, sex, and money. We thought that even though most people did not like talking about these things, the topics were intriguing enough that people would show up on Sundays out of mere curiosity. It worked, we had a very good pledge drive that year, and congregants talked about the sermon series for years.
The service on death generated the most feedback and questions. So much so that I decided to teach a six-week class on death which helped people explore their relationship with death and prepare for their own death. I offered it on Wednesday afternoons wondering if anyone would sign up. Twenty-six people attended the series. It was powerful.
Death is challenging; both thinking about our own death and losing people we love. Our faith tradition does not have any answers about death. Unlike most religious traditions, we have no clear theology or eschatology about death, no roadmap of the afterlife. This can make the topic of death a bit scarier, but a lot more interesting.
During my time with you this month, in collaboration with the Caring Network and the Worship Team, we are offering three opportunities for you to explore death. These events are described in this newsletter. I hope you will attend at least one of them, even if you feel apprehensive.
I love what bell hooks said about death: “Love empowers us to live fully and die well. Death becomes, then, not an end to life but a part of living.” When we dive into death we dive into life and come face to face with our hearts. The beautiful thing about congregational life and our faith is that we have the privilege of exploring challenging subjects together, in community with love and acceptance and curiosity.
If any of this is bringing up difficult thoughts or feelings for you, please do not hesitate to reach out to me. It is an honor to serve you and partake in your journey.
Bright blessings and lots of love to each one of you in this New Year!
Rev. Christina
CANCELLED A Personal Exploration of Death & Dying (5 in-person sessions) Unfortunately, only 4 people registered. Some people expressed interest, but the time did not work for them. Perhaps we’ll do a one day workshop on a Saturday in the spring when we’ll look at our personal relationship with death from a religious and spiritual perspective; learn about ways to prepare for death birth in ordinary and non-ordinary reality; explore grief and loss; and dive into the question of what happens after we die. This class is informative, experiential, and may involve small groups.
CVUUS Library Resources
Green Burial
CVUUS offered a Green Burial presentation and discussion on May 11, 2017. The short video, Dying Green, was shown, followed by a brief talk by Michelle Acciavatti, a home funeral, green burial and advance care planning guide, and death midwife from Montpelier. Green burial is a return to the way we have cared for our dead for thousands of years. A green burial does not embalm the body, uses a simple biodegradable shroud or coffin, no concrete or steel vault, and a grave of only three and a half feet deep. For more information, visit Green Burial Resources 1.10.24 and https://vermontgreenburial.wordpress.com/